So, it’s been a bit of a ghost town considering grad school and poor time management. Seeing as I’m on winter break, I finally have time to play Warcraft, catch up on my fan fiction, and make you all experience the hell that is free online Frozen video games. Let’s start with Elsa Resurrection Emergency.
I first must give kudos to the dramatic hospital remix of “Let It Go” that plays when Elsa’s heart suddenly gives out for some unexplained reason. You then point and click the highlighted medical tools to direct Anna to give Elsa CPR, including defibrillation!
As strange as it is to see Frozen characters in a modern hospital setting, it’s a pretty straightforward game that is both accurate as the genre allows and easy to play. This is perfect for that young children that are fans of both Frozen and playing doctor.
But say you have a child that’s interested in Frozen, brain surgery, and throwing reality to the wind?
There are few words I have for this game, and those words are: oh no.
Anna’s Brain Surgery befuddles me because it is confused about itself. On the one hand, it’s all seriously medical when we put Anna out with sleeping gas, shave her hair, and cut her off part of her scalp. You then have the bizarre fantastical elements of a miniature Olaf chilling on her lobes, snapping her skull back together in puzzle pieces, and growing her hair back with a wave of a magic wand. Finally, the final part of this game are a make-up/dress-up game. I’ve come out of car accidents with less whiplash.
Clearly, we need a palate cleanser, and I know just the thing:
Here’s the thing that Elsa Leaving Jack Frost gets totally right but Anna’s Brain surgery totally bumbles: it completely owns its cheesy soap opera tone.
In a sea of “Elsa and Jack Frost Get Married :D,” “Elsa and Jack Frost Have a Baby :D” and “Dress Up Elsa and Jack Frost as the Perfect Couple :D” games, this one shines above the rest. It is a game that takes the break-up storyline completely seriously whilst poking fun at the Elsa/Jack Frost fandom.
The level menu is Elsa’s diary (which I thought was cute), and the first thing you got to do is pack! Unfortunately, you need a magnifying glass to find what you need and click on it. There’s a little color-coder on the magnifying glass that lets you know when you’re close to the item you need, and in this glorious mess you’re going to need all the help you can get.
Next you write Jack a note, and you can either hand write it to him or text him a break-up note like an asshole:
only it’s not so much writing but picking a pun-tastic paragraph. Afterwards, you make a tinder profile for Elsa:
You then pick a tinder date for Elsa that calls into question the fidelity of a Mr. Eugene Fitzherbert:
Here I felt the game could have gone a little farther and added tinder profiles for the five potential tinder dates. Whatever, now that we’ve chosen a date, we have to decide: are we really ready to leave forever 17-year-old winter spirit/Guardian Jack Frost? Let’s see what Jack says about the situation:
Well, when you put it that way…
I think that’s all the energy I have for these weird little online games that are perfect for burning 10 minutes at a time and asking yourself what sort of weird little world we live in that produced a brain surgery game where you scoop out a snowman.